…You were doing a compulsion so much that you forgot it actually did temporarily relieve your anxiety until you stopped doing it at all and then realized how much your brain is screaming at you that something bad is going to happen if you don’t do that thing. o.o Like, you go all day without doing it for days and you’re like: “Yay! I’m winning!” but then you wake up in the morning after having dreams about doing it and the first thing your brain screams at you each morning is: “Hey! You know that thing you’re trying not to do? Do that!!”
It’s doubly bad because the whole time I was doing the compulsion, I was still feeling a ton of anxiety anyway. So basically the rule is: I can feel a lot of anxiety, and do compulsions.
I can feel a lot of anxiety, and not do compulsions.
The compulsions at first appear to relieve the anxiety, but may actually exacerbate it.